When I was a toddler, about 2 or 3, I was babysat by my Grandma Stella every day. Grandma Stella loved to watch Days of Our Lives and got me hooked at the same time that I graduated from diapers to the potty. I can remember story lines that occurred 25 years ago on that show.... and I am not even 30 yet! I really wanted to be on that show. Still do. What a great career it would be to get all dolled up, make good money and make out with super insane hot men all day! When I said this to my "theatre" friends at 18 years old, they thought I was insane! They all wanted to do Shakespeare in the Park, Off Broadway shows and possibly make some good independent films. I was dreaming of a much different acting career. I wanted to be Sarah Michelle Gellar. I wanted to start on a soap (like she did), win a Daytime Emmy (like she did) and go on to star in an awesome prime-time role like Buffy (the Vampire Slayer for those who live under a rock!). I wanted stardom. Acting, singing... it didn't matter! Pretty far fetched for a girl raised in Orleans.
So now, I am not famous, I do not get to kiss Mr.McDreamy (no offense Cory) all day, and I certainly don't make loads of money with my home daycare. But guess what.... I'm happy! I have 2 amazing boys who I would not trade for all the dolling up, money, or hot men! I am 20 lbs overweight, rarely showered, living paycheck to paycheck, and I get to kiss 3 men every day. Not too shabby!
My wonderful sister Shanon tells me its not too late.... but I am far more realistic. I would never be able to put in the hours it requires to "make it" as an actor without completely neglecting my children. My kids come first. Always have, always will. Some people believe that even though you have kids, you can still do everything you want to do..... but sorry.... that is just so not true! So, what does this mean for Kim? This means I will be the best darn entertaining Mom in the world! My kids may cover their ears when I sing... and my kids might not ever win me that Daytime Emmy for my role as Samantha Brady on Days of Our Lives, but they will make me smile every day, and they will make me feel like I have just won the biggest award ever.... Best Mommy!
I used to wish I was an actress, too, and had a real talent for it back in the day. But you know, the older I get and the more Hollywood gossip I follow, the more I realize how many sad, lonely famous people are in the world. I don't want to be one of those people. I don't want to never see my kids, be photographed all the time, never have a special moment without worrying that my privacy could be betrayed at any time in the name of the almighty dollar. That's an empty world full of material things and people who admire you for the characters you portray rather than the person you really are. I'd rather join a local theatre group or sing at a local pub so that I can use my talents as a creative outlet while still enjoying the great life I have today. You are a wonderful mommy, a wonderful friend, and hugely entertaining! I'm glad you're not chasing the stars anymore and are comfortable being the amazing Kim, sans paparazzi ;)
ReplyDeleteThanks Amanda. I don't know if I could handle the pressure to be 95 lbs and always on my best behavior to be honest.
ReplyDeleteI did community theatre for a long time and I really enjoyed it. The only thing, I never felt like one of them because I was not quick to judge those who followed pop culture. Saying you liked Gwen Stefani was like saying you were a Stepford Wife!
Maybe I will just direct my kids school plays.... if they will let me!